Size 12 is such an average number that French fries and Chicken
dipped in holy loads of creamy ranch was an average meal.
That girl lived in SLC and had skippity steps to skip down.
She skipped and skopped her way right down to a size 10.
Size 10 looked so "trim" compared to 12 that trim foods
like spinach found a way to excommunicate the Holy Lord of Ranch.
Then came the great freeze.
The great freeze where this girl sat at a desk that had no skippity steps.
No skippity steps and the Holy Lord of Ranch returned in the form of JCWs.
This girl was a trim 10 so of course trim people can eat HOLY LOADS of ranch.
WRONG!
This girl is now a size 14 and her only saving grace is that if a plan crashed in the ocean...
maybe all the fat residing on her tummy would help her float.
Then again maybe not....
So now this girl eats fish ( YUCK!) and broccoli for dinner.
She goes to her first training session at the gym
and comes home so sore that walking downstairs
is a comedy act all by it's self....
Everything HURTS!
This girl stinks and aches and is not a trim little 10.
(We won't even go into the fact that to be truly healthy ...
her short person body should be an 8...)
So dear Teeny Tiny Shrink My Hiney Fairy Godmother....
Please visit soon!
If you can't find me I will crying at the gym in pain
while randomly stuffing fruits and veggies down my throat.
Because all I ever wanted in my whole life was to
gracefully sink to the bottom off the ocean if my plane
did happen to crash.
Oh and my thighs not rubbing together would be nice too!
